I am just gonna spill it all out

A blog isn't a blog,till the author writes something bout his personal life.
His deepest thoughts, the inner him.
So here's a little something something.

I am a paranoid soul.I am too sensitive , trust me, i am sick of it.
I fall in and out of love oh too easily, and yes, i am sick of it.
I am right smack between being a boy and being an adult,
and i think i just wasted my early teens.

I am 16 and i haven't made my parents proud of who i am.
I am 16 and i have not even made myself unforgettable.
I am 16 and i think barely anyone in my primary school recognises me.
I am 16 and i have not sneaked into any clubs illegally.
I am 16 and i have not prefected my skills in English Language.The one subject i actually love.
I am 16 and i have not passed all my papers in one exam before.
I am 16 and i have not have a long relationship before.
I am 16 and my longest relationship is 4 months.
I am 16 and i have not asked a girl out, face to face.

Really. I am sick and tired of this.This are my targets before 8th January 2008[17th birthday]I want to do everything and expierence everything.One lifetime, 16 years ain't gonna come back anymore.

Come tommorrow, I will not be sensitive anymore.I would not let minute matters affect the way i am.My english is going to comparable to Dinesh's in the near future. I cant be ripping off vocabs from him anymore.For the relationship part? After the Os. I hate this sinking feeling you get when you think of someone you admire.The sense of longing for this perfect soulmate.I know shes there somewhere.

Everyonce in a while, you make an unforgettable friend.
Let that unforgettable friend be me.
I would want to leave this world with friends saying,
'He lived his life meaningfully, honestly and with honour'.
Until my time comes,
I am going to make sure that i make a differerence in people's life.


One life,make the best out of it.
Thanks for reading this post and leave a tag please.
Tell me if i have over-done it.

Oh Lazy Tuesday. How much i miss you.

Right.
An epiphany.
Nice time to have it though. 3 weeks to exams.
There's still hope.
I hope.

I miss my Tuesdays,
when I was so free.
Now, its study study study.
cliched, but true.

Brewerkz. A night of sin.

First off:
A BIG thank you shout out to XN,
for the free beer.
It was great.
And Nik,
Thanks for the whatever.
And Fabian
Thanks for joining us.

Xn , Nik , Fabian and I went to Brewerkz near riverwalk,
for beer and burgers.
There was a huge selection of beers.
I am not a fan of beer, but i enjoyed it.
It was good.I recommend the Golden Ale.
Smooth and sweet.
We then walked round and round Riverwalk.
Encountering a wide variety of bengs and lians.
Nik and Fabian were really into babe-watching.
'Miss blue?'

We got kicked out of a couple of pubs.
Even while desperately trying to pose as foreigners.
We managed to get into a club.
Coffee Club =(

Just because i can't think of a better name.

Here's something.
Tangrams give me headaches.
I am not joking.
It was terrible.
It was almost as bad as a hangover.

So does that rubiks cube thingy.
Why is everyone in school playing with these things right now?.
Oh my. I have attempted.
And it demoralizes me.

Yea. Couldn't blog for a loooong time.
Exams Shaxams.
It's boring and useless.
I wish exams never existed.
I mean.
Why would we need like trigonometry later in life[maybe for some only] ?
I would rather be tested on social skills or like street skills.
Book-smart or street-smart.
I'd rather the latter.

For all the mums and dads of the world.

Like a phoenix's fire,
dies;
is rekindled with a tear
A pact made at birth
lasts longer than immortality

-Mark Tan


Something i have written for my parents.
Please comment thanks.


'I hate my parents'
People who have had this thought run through their minds before
think again.
Guilty. Yes i was
but never again.
If they told you that they wished you have never been born,
it's all probably lies.
Parental love is eternal, people.

Singaporeans, Brave or just dead stupid.

Tremors Tremors.
So much screaming.
So much chaos.
But honestly: who stands next to a building which has a possibility of falling,
Head tilted 85 degrees upwards.
Faces filled with fear.
5cm away from the base of the building
and Death would greet them IF the building imploded.

and the scenario that follows:
The alarm stopped.
No all-clear sign was given.
BUT I still could see people.
Pacing into the building like it was safe.
Some even joking:
"Oh. Die then die la"
"I cheated death"
"Why you all run. I just coolly walked out"
If it really collapsed.
I would not feel sorry for them at all.
When life is at stake.
There are no risks to be taken.
Arrogant idiots.

in a less serious light;
Like what the clique always says,
"Mark you are just unlucky"
And it is once again proven:
"Macs or KFC?"
..."Macs"
-Order food.
-Alarm.
I was even scared that if i had walked into the building.
It would collapse with my first step.


Maybe i should stop insulting myself.
Yea i should.


My sympathies go out to the victims of the recent tsunami.
And to the families of the victims.

i am mark!

Nik sparked a conversation about Megatron.
Get real Nik. Megatron isnt real
neither is Starscream.

I noticed something bout myself today.
A table of 7.
Coffeeshop [Blk 57].
I am someone who listens.
Never speaks.
3 times i tried to make a suggestion.
All weren't heard.
These are a few things i did to attract attention:

I cried
"I am going to commit suicide"
"Suiiiiciiide"
"Like i am going to kill myself now."
"like right now."
"Bye."
no one heard.
bet you guys didn't hear.
Only Dinesh was laughing hysterically.
Thats a friend.

I started using my teaspoon and tinkle with a glass.
Classy way to get attention.
Like in weddings.
I am definitely not the best man.

"I have cigarettes "

"I am late for mosque"

None worked.
I need a voice.
No insult guys.

Me and Dippi had our own conversation.
Talking bout Oceans series and Pride and Prejudice.
While the others talked about Transformers and Alien Vs Predator.
Maybe we are just in a different class.
Or different preference.
But whatever.
Friends we still are.
I am happy with what i have.
I am born a follower. I guess i just have to live with it.

Anyway.
BIRTHDAY SHOUT OUT TO:

Krystal Fernandez. Happy 15th.!
See.I did not forget. Kinda fast.
Now we share 3 years of friendship.

Dexter Chua. Happy 18th!
Legal. Buy me a bottle of Alize. Keep in touch.

Noel Layno. Happy 17th!
17 years of existence.
Servers forever. Congrats.

Anyway. Heres the servers that went to the Youth Rally 2007.



-Mark
[in case you forgot who i was again][it happens a lot]

Birthday Shoutout & why boys shouldnt wear ladies pants.

Happy Birthday Ming Ee [Aunt Helen for you guys who are wondering].
A shout-out from Singapore to New York.
Happy 30-ish birthday.Yes,I would not reveal your age.
QUICK. Get married.I want some cousins.
Even though you are 30-ish.
I swear you can still pass off as someone 20-ish.
Still young at heart.
Wrinkle-free? Most probably.
Everyone wants a modern and youthful auntie.
And i have lucky to have one.

Quick. Finish your job in NY.
Come back here.
Everyone in the family misses you.
By the way.
Mum is most probably gonna fly me there after Os =)


Mark.


Seriously.
This really happened.
Xn , dinesh, Shane , Nik and Matt wanted to play pool after school.
I brought a set of clothing out to change.
Unfortunately, I brought my mum's jeans instead.
I didn't have a choice.
So i wore them.
Embarrassed.
And violated.
Shane couldn't stop staring at my ass.
Nik couldn't stop making fun.
But whatever.
Shit happens.
I think Matt has the pictures from dippi.
But whatever. It's all good fun.

Pool Table[2 hours] - $4 each.
Food/Lunch/junk snacks - $4
Drinks - $3
Laughing at Mark wearing ladies jeans. - Priceless.

Go ahead and laugh.

I got trashed

What was i doing?

Night.
I changed out of the horrid pants and was pulled to the Youth Rally at Novena Church.
It was enriching.
JJ was disappointed.
No girls his age. Aw.
I sat beside Desiree-something.
The covergirl for Maxim September 2007.
Noel managed to snatch a picture with her.
Me? I am not into celeb gazing.
She is just a Man in a Bowler to me.